The Day I fired Little Tommy

I am sitting in the office today catching up on admin stuff and am bored out of my mind. Truth be told I think I would rather pull a couple of teeth with a pair of channel locks than sit here any longer. Maybe?

Something happened a bit ago here in the office which I will get to in a minute that sparked a memory from the way back machine.

I once had an employee that we all called Little Tommy who was anything but little.

Well Little Tommy had a drug problem that made him a really bad employee.

I decide one morning as he is late for like the 5^th time to fire him on the spot. I saw him pull up and went outside to greet him, when he saw me he instantly knew that he was toast and proceeded to flip out it a big way.

As previously mentioned he was anything but small and he was also a crack head that is prone to violence.

As he was shrieking at the top of his lungs I am envisioning having to brawl with him, I am looking around for anything I can use as a weapon, then I decide the best defense on this one is to just run if need be. Did I mention that he was completely psychotic as well?

Back then I had a good sized office in Fountain Hills, he was screaming so loud that my guys in the back parking lot could make out every word.

Fortunately, much like a small child he screamed himself out and screeched out of the parking lot in his F150 almost hitting several parked cars.

I have another story about Little Tommy and Big Hector that I will post a little later under a new thing I am going to write about called “Stupid things an employer has to endure”.

No matter how much a person deserves it I have never liked firing someone, although every time I have done it (which is a lot) my company always gets better.

OK, now to what happened today.

Since the days of the big office in Fountain Hills I have down sized considerably and hold a very small space in a flex spot that I rent from a custom home builder that is a client.

I was sitting up to my eyes balls in non-captivating admin when I hear a door slam next door, several seconds later the screaming started, not just screaming, the kind of screaming where people die.

I got up and walked out, looked at the guys secretary and she nodded that she was ok, I backed into my office and started looking around for a weapon.

I have an over active imagination and all I could envision was the guy shooting his partner and going on a rampage.

As am looking around I see a cylinder of sea salt, a bottle of Cholula sauce and a metal water bottle that is empty.

I immediately devise a plan that if the guy comes out with a gun and gets crazy I will throw the cylinder of sea salt at him for distraction and then charge and push him over the balcony, therefore eliminating the threat to anyone.

So as I prepare myself for utter mayhem something happened. Much like the child Little Tommy, the guy screamed himself out and returned to his own office, shortly after they left as best friends for lunch.

Now is that some serious communication or does a guy just have to occasionally pop a cork?